My coach calls it…
Packing eight pounds of nuts in a four pound bag. Sound familiar? Or am I the only one that has seen a timeframe and shoved everything under the sun in that amount of time? And how did it go?
Let me explain…
First- yes. I did that. Guilty as charged. We were going to St. Pete Beach, Florida, for a week-long vacation with our kids. The plan was to sit by the beach, play in the sand, and spend time in the water. And I over-packed. At this point in my life, the false sense of urgency was just about killing me. Those of you who have spent some time with me have at least heard that term. If you aren’t familiar, check out my first book. I am guessing you will be able to relate.
So what’s with the 8 books?
That little voice of urgency that was constantly on my shoulder told me that I needed to be productive on my trip. I couldn’t just relax. Even though I truly needed every moment to relax that I could get. I was torched. I had been pushing too hard for too long. And somehow I thought the answer was to be productive on vacation.
You really did that?
Yes I did. And not just any books. All eight were personal development or self-help books. This is the space where I do most of my reading. I enjoy these books, but they aren’t exactly light reading. They are books that I write in, make notes in, underline things. These are not the get lost in a story type of books.
I knew I needed to rest…
It is said that if you work with your mind, you should rest with your hands. My work is mind-centric. Constantly making treatment and patient-management decisions in my dental practice. And using my mind to create content, keynote talks, and workshops on the other days. I don’t give my mind much of a rest. In the past I have really paid for it. Burnout is the price that comes when you never give yourself any time to rest.
And even worse…
I sub-consciously set an expectation for myself. On vacation. I brought 8 books. Which meant I expected to read 8 books. Spoiler alert- I didn’t read 8 books. I read four. Which is still aggressive for a 7-day vacation with your family. I was a bit let down. In setting such a high expectation for myself, I self-sabotaged my vacation. I took a mind that was already stressed and maxed out and added another burden. I added another expectation to a brain that needed a Sabbath.
How many times do we do this to ourselves? Call it what you will… friendly fire or self-sabotage. If self-sabotage is new to you, get ready to get your eyes opened with this article. And we do it all the time. Eight books on a 7-day vacation is extreme, but have you done any of these?
- Watching TV/ videos/ phone/ Netflix way too late at night and ruining your sleep?
- Eating a big meal right before bed
- Drinking too much and making a fool of yourself in front of others
- Scheduling your day too tight so you can’t hope to make everything work
- Going down a video rabbit hole when you have a mountain of work to do
- Trading sleep for productivity for one too many nights
- Having unreasonable expectations of yourself or others
The first step is awareness…
And then give yourself some grace. You made a bad choice. I made a really bad choice. And that choice caused me to make decisions with my time on vacation that didn’t give me the rest I needed. I even started a new book on the flight home as a last-ditch effort to get closer to my goal. Who does that? I am guessing a lot of us do. And it’s ok. We all have to battle the false sense of urgency. We all have to make choices for rest when we get the chance. Wisdom is messing it up a few times and learning to not do it again.
We are all in this together…
False sense of urgency eating at you and preventing rest and margin in your life? Want to talk about it? Shoot me an email. Let’s talk. Whatever you choose, may it be hope. The false sense of urgency doesn’t have to control your life. Good days are ahead with a few small course corrections. #WINtheNOW
What if we didn’t try to pack eight pounds of nuts in a four pound bag? What a novel concept.