A Beautiful Letdown

Jun 17, 2023

What goes up, must come down…

At the Recker house, all roads have been leading to June 10.  From early May of 2022 when my son Blake asked his girl friend, Emily, to marry him and they set a date, June 10 has had a huge star on our calendar.  And in this season, it wasn’t just the wedding.  Our youngest son, Jace, graduated from high school.  He has had registration and a looming move-in date to make my wife and myself empty-nesters.

Emily graduated from college and moved back to our hometown where they will live and they found an apartment to make their first home.

But June 10 was always the big day…

In the midst of all, this is where the arrow pointed.  And I don’t know about you, but when there is a big event on the calendar, I tend to get zeroed in on that day.

I may have a little Clark Griswold in me.  I may set rather high expectations for myself and others and have a thought of how something might go that turns out to not be very realistic.  Can anyone sympathize or relate? Everyone else can see it… but I seem to miss it in the ramp-up.

And then June 10 happened…

It was amazing.  It was beautiful.  It was a true celebration from the rehearsal dinner to the final clean-up.  There was so much happiness.  So much joy.  It was a series of outstanding moments that I will never forget.  True five-senses experiences.  And we crashed.  Hard.

All of a sudden it was June 11…

All the ramp up.  All the planning.  All the checks written.  All the preparation.  All the gifts.  All of the moving into a new place.  All of it.  In the rearview mirror.  And we were face to face with the beautiful letdown.  The moment after the moment.  The come down after the going up.  That moment where your adrenal gland waves the white flag and says give me a break for awhile!  I am done being amped up!

And you come to that place…

That place where you realize that what comes up must come down.  The aftermath of the big event.  We have all been there.  The thing we have been planning for so long and then it happens.  And no matter how it turned out, good, bad, or otherwise, we have to face a big, unavoidable question…

Then what?

No matter what happens in our lives, there will always be a then what moment.  Now I don’t want to be too dramatic.  As the father of the groom, my responsibilities were more financial than anything else, but this is my first-born, my boy.  And this is a fork in the road!  And there has to be a then what.  And if you don’t face it and decide to stuff it, it will come back.  I promise you!

So what do we do?

We acknowledge it.  The dip is coming.  The moment after the moment is coming.  It is unavoidable.  So here’s a couple of things we did-

  1. Know it is coming.  Acknowledge it.  Don’t hide from it.  Don’t pretend it isn’t coming.
  2. Give yourself some grace as it happens.  The moment after the moment is hard!  It may be really tough and that’s ok!
  3. Know what’s next.  Always have joy on the calendar.  Have the next thing scheduled.  In a few weeks we are going on a vacation because we need it!  We knew we would!
  4. Allow some time for rest before just jumping right into the next thing.  your body needs a little break.  Trust me in this!
  5. Don’t be sad it’s over.  Be thankful it happened.  Gratitude is a super power and helps bridge the gap to whatever is next.

What goes up must come down…

And that’s ok.  Enjoy the moment.  Be fully present.  Remember to #WINtheNOW.  Because then what is right around the corner!

Here’s another blog you might like that talks about then what.

And just for fun, here’s some great listening from one of my favorite bands and their album, Beautiful Letdown.

 

2 Comments

  1. Juli

    One of your BEST thus far!!! Thanks again for the thoughtful reminder ders. As you approach your new season as empty nesters remember to eMbRaCe the calm !! It’s not a bad gig … really!!! 😉

    Reply
    • Eric Recker

      Thank you for the kind words Juli! I truly believe, with this and many other things in life, #gooddaysareahead!

      Reply

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