This one will drain you faster than just about anything I know.
How do I know? I know because this plagued me for the first 20 years of my dental practice.
But I didn’t even know what to call it.
It was a crushing burden on Monday morning. And I couldn’t figure it out. As someone who already struggled mightily with the Sunday scaries and the fear of Monday, this made it almost unbearable.
I am talking about trying to be everything to everyone.
Can I let you in on a little secret?
YOU CAN’T BE EVERYTHING TO EVERYONE!
And it’s not just you. No one can.
But we think we need to be. We have convinced ourselves that we need to be. We put an expectation on it. And we feel others have that expectation of us.
And we won’t be. We simply won’t be everything to everyone. Somewhere we will fall short. Sometimes we won’t have the answer. Oftentimes we will find that we are just as stumped as the person who expects us to know.
When expectations are that high- there is only one option- failure. And disappointment. That draining feeling. Like we let someone down. When we really let ourselves down by carrying a yoke that was too much for us.
I don’t know about you, but I don’t like failure.
I don’t like it at all. But we can learn from failure. We serve a god who can redeem our failures and move us forward.
At some point we simply have to come to this realization. No matter who you are. No matter what you do. No matter how many people you lead or oversee… You can’t be it all. You can’t do it all.
And that is ok. There is actually massive freedom in that realization. Because we can quit trying to be all.
There is freedom in saying this- you know what, I don’t know the answer to that. I don’t have a solution for that- but we can figure it out together.
See what that does? It releases you from responsibility and allows for collaboration and working together for a solution. It can feel like failure but it is not. It is actually a strength. It is actually freedom.
With your families. At your workplace. With those around you that look to you. There is freedom in not trying to be all and know all. Because you can’t and you won’t. And neither have I.
Being everything becomes an idol in our lives. We think of ourselves as more important than we really are. Like the weight of the world is on our shoulders.
We are replaceable. And while that might cause anxiety, it should cause peace and freedom.
The higher we think of ourselves, the more likely and the greater the fall.
So what do we do with this?
We humbly realize that we are doing the best we can with what we have. And we realize our limits. And we do our best to be our best version everyday.
One that doesn’t carry that burden. That sounds like an amazing way to #WINtheNOW!
If you would like to keep the discussion going on the everything myth and need some guidance on getting unstuck, check out my coaching page! Let’s have a conversation.